We ship every other day via UPS and via the US Postal Service to foreign destinations and military bases.

But this isn't any corduroy, it's Cordarounds aerodynamic cord. The horizontal orientation allows wind to whip through the wales, shaving precious nanoseconds off your walks about.  And your arms swoosh silently, the meshing grooves offering no onomatopoetic alert of your approach.

Our researchers have discovered that, somewhere between the second and third cocktail, the coat magically transforms from subtle corduroy to screaming smoker.  The results, of course, depend on the wearer. Some switch sooner, and we praise them for it.

Our limited edition designs -- pants, coats, blankets, shorts, and seersucker line -- have received great coverage in the press.   A summary:

Worn Incognito, the jacket features all the amenities of a high-end corduroy coat.

Worn Bavarianized, you can display the fine cashmere collar liner for all to see.

With auto hankie deployed, you're one step closer to full smoking jacket mode.

Worn in Nehru smoking jacket mode, all conversation will center around you.

LASER WRIST LOGO 

Each article of Cordarounds clothing comes with a red horizontal corduroy tab, triangle, or doohickey. For this jacket, our scientists were tasked to invent something exciting and new.

They delivered -- a triangle cuff logo that reverses along with the jacket. The double-sided, “look at my hand when I’m speaking to you” logo is like having a laser pointer affixed to your wrist. People will follow your every gesture. A powerful innovation, just you see...

The world of tactile technology was once satisfied with "soft as a baby's bottom" as the measure of absolute softness. And anyone who dared name something "softer than" the aforementioned infant's posterior was suggesting a theoretical, quantum world of soft that existed beyond anything man could conceive.

That is, until researchers at the Cordarounds Livermore Laboratory invented the Tactile Soft-o-meter, a device that can detect and compare the density of softrons, the subatomic units of softness. And while this has proven a Nobel worthy discovery, our scientists could not simply rest on their laurels.

Using this newfound knowledge, they set out to line the pockets of our world famous reversible smoking jackets. And so comfy was the fabric they developed, so rich and impossibly supple, that test subjects had to have their hands removed from the coat pockets with the Jaws of Life. Success!

But what to name this miracle material? Again and again, the Soft-o-meter produced a result that had our marketing department in a nervous titter. But we're scientists dammit, not salesmen, and if the Soft-meter says this fabric measures "Vagisoft" within a standard deviation of one softron, so it shall be named!